Self-Compassion by Kristin Neff. I kept hearing about this book everywhere and decided to use it to pilot my book club x group coaching. And wow, it was so much heavier than I thought it would be. Thank goodness we had that book club accountability to get through it together.

Here's what I learned about self-compassion: it's not fluffy.

Self-compassion has three parts:

Self-compassion helps us retire that superhero cape and connect us back to our humanity and the humanity of others. It can help us let go of perfectionism, all-or-nothing thinking and counter that strong inner critic voice.

There’s something about this framing that really worked for me. Instead of focusing on identifying saboteurs or analyzing the inner critic, it’s more about leaning into love and self-compassion and reminding ourselves that we are imperfect humans, exactly as we were designed to be. It’s been life changing for me in my own growth journey and so I really wanted to share this with you too.

The next time you're feeling off, or you've done something you consider "stupid," or you're just being hard on yourself:

Stop. Take a few deep breaths. Wrap your arms around yourself and just give yourself a hug…like a physical, real hug.

You might even add some gentle self-talk: "Oh, darling. It's okay. I know you're embarrassed that you reacted like that. You're only human and sometimes you're going to have bad reactions."

Notice what it feels like to be held by yourself. To soothe yourself. It might feel silly at first but it really works.

Want to go deeper?
During one of our book club sessions, we practiced a loving kindness meditation together. I ended up recording a 30-minute version afterward.

If you’re reading this via email, just click “Read Online” in the top right corner to view (and comment on) the web version.

What's your relationship with your own humanity?

With love and gratitude,
Jenn